I'm no expert but would suggest more space around her so the vignette doesn't interfere with her head , she also looks a bit like she is leaning backward [ slight angle of the camera ?] . Besides that the general pose and exposure looks quite good . I recently bought a 17-50 2.8 lens to help with dark places , very useful .
Post more images , we all learn from it !
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Post more images , we all learn from it !